Transparency International’s annual corruption perception index (CPI) released Tuesday announces that the #1 most corrupt country in the world is Somalia. We interviewed a very emotional and teary eyed Somali drug lord and he had this to say,
We’ve worked extra hard this year and put in long hours killing, stealing and kidnapping and it finally payed off.
Amid the excitement and deafening gunfire you could barely make out the chants of these almost deliriously happy young men shouting “We’re #1 … We’re #1“.
The streets were ablaze with celebration and singing throughout the day. The Somali pirates and drug lords kept positive though they were 2nd place throughout the year to Myanmar. Only within the last few hours did they overtake Myanmar with a very well thought out strategy.
We knew we were in 2nd place and we had to work together and impress the judges of Transparency International if we wanted to win this thing.
Said Abdi, a local Somali gang member.
The group of young men began looting local stores and beating people in hopes of securing the #1 spot. It was not until they started killing most of the Transparency judges that the one badly injured judge was impressed enough and gave a thumbs up to the murderous group, letting them know they stood up to the challenge and made their country proud. Congratulations Somalia you are the worst country in the world!!
